12/15/06

The ice thaws...

I drove home alone from shopping tonight after a cold walk through the mall parking lot and a pleasant evening with my mother. So many thoughts.

We were looking through ornaments and a wave of images passed through me, people I had lost, the passing of time, the state of things, and a quiet melancholy that sometimes comes with the season. But heaven was close too and so were the kind of cleansing tears we Orthodox like to think of as a second baptism.

Somewhere beneath the layers of work, a few hard months, and the cold evening wind there is still a heart and a soft spot that can be reached. I was beginning to worry, you know, that I was much too tired or perhaps was doomed to pass through this time of year with robotic efficiency. Yet the quiet place inside that was lost has been found and if it doesn't last at least I have it now and I'll enjoy the moment.

How I wish a deep and enduring peace in Christ for myself and those I love but even more for this tired old world! And part of me thinks that maybe, just maybe, this holy season will be just that for the world. I'm probably foolish, of course, but I'm glad I can still feel that way, still hold out for something better, and believe that it's not all useless or a night without end.

Thank you Lord, for that gift given to us sinners a glimmer of light that the darkness cannot overcome.



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